Sean and I are happy to announce that we are having a
GIRL!!!!!!!!!!
We are naming her Sarah Elizabeth and calling her Sarah Beth.
My doctor has changed my due date to May 17th based on ultrasounds and the baby's growth!
As soon as we get ultrasound pics scanned in, we will post those.
Merry Christmas!!!!!
Monday, December 22, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Gatlinburg Nov 08
I am almost 15 weeks! It seems crazy to me at times that I have made it this far. Sean and I feel so blessed to know that in six months our little jellybean will be here. My next doctor's appointment is Dec 2. We are hoping that my doctor will allow us to schedule the big ultrasound the week of Christmas. (I will be 19 weeks Christmas Eve). We dont really care if it is a boy or girl as long as the baby is healthy.
Sean and I spent 3 nights in Gatlinburg! We realized this may be our last vacation before little Jellybean makes and appearance and we had a great time. We went to several places we visited back in March and then some new places we had not been before.
Sean built a fire in the fireplace all 3 nights we were in Gatlinburg.
Another view of our room. This is our second trip to Gatlinburg and we have stayed at the Rocky Water Motor Inn both times. We love it. Its not a fancy hotel but it works for us. Not to mention that all of the rooms in this hotel overlook a stream.
Sean and I at the Village in Gatlinburg.
Sean playing in the trees at the Christmas Place.
Me playing in the trees at the Christmas Place. This store is actually in Pigeon Forge, but its my favorite place to visit and play!
Sean and I spent 3 nights in Gatlinburg! We realized this may be our last vacation before little Jellybean makes and appearance and we had a great time. We went to several places we visited back in March and then some new places we had not been before.
Sean built a fire in the fireplace all 3 nights we were in Gatlinburg.
Another view of our room. This is our second trip to Gatlinburg and we have stayed at the Rocky Water Motor Inn both times. We love it. Its not a fancy hotel but it works for us. Not to mention that all of the rooms in this hotel overlook a stream.
Sean and I at the Village in Gatlinburg.
Sean playing in the trees at the Christmas Place.
Me playing in the trees at the Christmas Place. This store is actually in Pigeon Forge, but its my favorite place to visit and play!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
10 weeks and counting!
Praise the Lord I am 10 WEEKS today!!!!!
I am so very excited to be at this point. After all of the miscarriages I never thought I would be sitting here praising God for 10 weeks of pregnancy. Sean kept saying it would happen and I didnt believe him. Nor, did I believe that the Lord would grant me (us) this miracle.
So far things are going pretty good. I have some moments of spotting. But nothing has come of it. I am still on strict restrictions until I hit the 12 week mark. I think even after that there will be some restrictions, but I am fine with that as long as there is a healthy baby come May.
People keep telling Sean to take good care of me. All I can say is that he has been GREAT about everything. Sean has been doing pretty much ALL of the housework with the exception of a couple loads of laundry here and there. He is doing a large majority of the grocery shopping and the errand running. He has even made me several meals in bed, just so that I can relax and not be on my feet. I dont think there is really anything else he can do to take care of me. He should win the award for Husband of the Year! He is doing all of this in addition to his regular work. For those of you close to us, know that he has had some very long weeks and weekends here lately. If you see Sean, please give him a word of encouragement. Bless his heart there are still 30 weeks left of this pregnancy and there will probably be many, many, many more things that he will have to do for me and the house. I love Sean so much and there is no way I could do this without him!
Have a blessed week!
I am so very excited to be at this point. After all of the miscarriages I never thought I would be sitting here praising God for 10 weeks of pregnancy. Sean kept saying it would happen and I didnt believe him. Nor, did I believe that the Lord would grant me (us) this miracle.
So far things are going pretty good. I have some moments of spotting. But nothing has come of it. I am still on strict restrictions until I hit the 12 week mark. I think even after that there will be some restrictions, but I am fine with that as long as there is a healthy baby come May.
People keep telling Sean to take good care of me. All I can say is that he has been GREAT about everything. Sean has been doing pretty much ALL of the housework with the exception of a couple loads of laundry here and there. He is doing a large majority of the grocery shopping and the errand running. He has even made me several meals in bed, just so that I can relax and not be on my feet. I dont think there is really anything else he can do to take care of me. He should win the award for Husband of the Year! He is doing all of this in addition to his regular work. For those of you close to us, know that he has had some very long weeks and weekends here lately. If you see Sean, please give him a word of encouragement. Bless his heart there are still 30 weeks left of this pregnancy and there will probably be many, many, many more things that he will have to do for me and the house. I love Sean so much and there is no way I could do this without him!
Have a blessed week!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Our MIRACLE!!!!!!!!
If you notice the baby is holding a balloon. Proof that it is Sean's child!
Well folks, it looks like God is still a God of miracles. Sean and I are expecting a little blessing on May 20, 2009! It has been quite a journey this far.
I was a little late and decided to just wait a couple of days and see what happens. I took my first HPT on 9/8 and it was positive. At that point based on my history I told Sean give it a couple of days and it will be over. I didnt believe that the Lord would bless us with a healthy pregnancy. On Thurs 9/11 I took another HPT and it was positive, so I called my Dr and they had me come in for round of beta's pn 9/12. They called back and sure enough I was pregnant my level was 780. Now I had to endure the weekend to wait to take round 2 of beta's. I did throw Sean a surprise b-day party that Fri night. Mon morning I went back in and they called that afternoon to say that my numbers were 3060. My numbers had more than tripled and all we needed was for the numbers to have doubled. On 9/23 I had an ultrasound done and the baby was measuring 3/4 of a centimeter and 5 weeks and 6 days. I went back for my 8 week ultrasound on 10/7 (the day before my birthday) and the baby was measuring right at 8 weeks!
We are so excited to have this little blessing and very appreciative of the friends and family who have prayed for us and with us so far on this journey. We are not out of the woods just yet. Once I reach about 13 weeks, we should be good for the rest of the pregnancy. At this point I have some restrictions as far as what I can eat or drink. I am not allowed to exercise. I am hoping that once I reach the 2nd trimester that some of the restrictions will be lifted. Please pray for Sean and I as we take this journey.
As we get farther into this I will be posting more pictures and updates. Thank you for all of your prayers. We love ya'll very much and feel very blessed to have all of you as friends!
I was a little late and decided to just wait a couple of days and see what happens. I took my first HPT on 9/8 and it was positive. At that point based on my history I told Sean give it a couple of days and it will be over. I didnt believe that the Lord would bless us with a healthy pregnancy. On Thurs 9/11 I took another HPT and it was positive, so I called my Dr and they had me come in for round of beta's pn 9/12. They called back and sure enough I was pregnant my level was 780. Now I had to endure the weekend to wait to take round 2 of beta's. I did throw Sean a surprise b-day party that Fri night. Mon morning I went back in and they called that afternoon to say that my numbers were 3060. My numbers had more than tripled and all we needed was for the numbers to have doubled. On 9/23 I had an ultrasound done and the baby was measuring 3/4 of a centimeter and 5 weeks and 6 days. I went back for my 8 week ultrasound on 10/7 (the day before my birthday) and the baby was measuring right at 8 weeks!
We are so excited to have this little blessing and very appreciative of the friends and family who have prayed for us and with us so far on this journey. We are not out of the woods just yet. Once I reach about 13 weeks, we should be good for the rest of the pregnancy. At this point I have some restrictions as far as what I can eat or drink. I am not allowed to exercise. I am hoping that once I reach the 2nd trimester that some of the restrictions will be lifted. Please pray for Sean and I as we take this journey.
As we get farther into this I will be posting more pictures and updates. Thank you for all of your prayers. We love ya'll very much and feel very blessed to have all of you as friends!
Sunday, September 21, 2008
The start of fall
I didnt realize how long it has been since I have posted on our blog. Life has been crazy and busy to say the least.
I started back to work on Aug 1st. The first week of so was busy trying to get things ready for the kids to come back to school. My first full week with students was crazy and full of drama to say the least. I am very grateful that things have calmed down and everyone is back in the swing of things. Choir is back in full swing and I am loving every minute of it.
Sean has started a new position within our church (and I couldnt be more proud of him!!!). He is the creative director of children's worship. Aug was a slow month for him, but this month has been absolutely busy for him which is great.
I have to say in our house right now the Lord is teaching us to trust in Him and to have hope. I am not at a point where I can elaborate on this yet, but it has been hard. We have prayed harder and longer than we have in a very long. We are very grateful for close friends and family who are walking through all of this with us. We continue to ask you to pray for us as we make decisions about what the Lord would have us to do. We are still hoping to adopt sometime in the near future. At this point we are saving as much as we can and waiting on the Lord to show us what direction we need to take.
I know this is a short update, but I will try and post more later!
I started back to work on Aug 1st. The first week of so was busy trying to get things ready for the kids to come back to school. My first full week with students was crazy and full of drama to say the least. I am very grateful that things have calmed down and everyone is back in the swing of things. Choir is back in full swing and I am loving every minute of it.
Sean has started a new position within our church (and I couldnt be more proud of him!!!). He is the creative director of children's worship. Aug was a slow month for him, but this month has been absolutely busy for him which is great.
I have to say in our house right now the Lord is teaching us to trust in Him and to have hope. I am not at a point where I can elaborate on this yet, but it has been hard. We have prayed harder and longer than we have in a very long. We are very grateful for close friends and family who are walking through all of this with us. We continue to ask you to pray for us as we make decisions about what the Lord would have us to do. We are still hoping to adopt sometime in the near future. At this point we are saving as much as we can and waiting on the Lord to show us what direction we need to take.
I know this is a short update, but I will try and post more later!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Summer Update
Well, I didnt realize that it has been 2 months since I have updated the blog. I guess I spend more time on facebook and updating our lives there than I do here. I will fill you in on our summer as well as adoption news.
Sean and I started out planning on having a nice quiet summer at home, and just a couple days in we realized that would not be the case. My 2nd day of summer break started with my car failing inspection. So, that started a week and a half of my car being in and out of the shop. We dropped a large sum of money and my car passed inspection. Then, I think that the hardest part is over and that it will be a piece of cake to get my tags. Wrong again! I needed to have my title. Even though we paid off my car last summer Nissan never mailed the title. I call Nissan to a) get the title and b) have my maiden name changed to my married name b/c I never got it changed. Nissan tells me that they never released the title from the vault, but they will send it out and I should have it within 7-10 business days. They also tell me that they cant change my last name.
For our 3rd anniversary Sean and I spent a very relaxing day at Fall Creek Falls State Park. Sean and I ate a picnic lunch and then headed to the falls. We spent a great deal of the afternoon sitting in our chairs reading. The sun was out and for a little while we actually most of the place to ourselves. Later that afternoon we packed up our stuff and headed out of the park. Sean decided to treat me to a little bit of shopping at the Outlets of Lebenon and then onto dinner at Outback Steakhouse.
As I am dealing with all of the car stuff, I get an invite to be a substitute chaperone for a mission trip to Miami, FL. I was excited and nervous about the trip. So on bright and early on a Sunday morning I board a plane with the senior high students from West End United Methodist. We served for a week through the DOOR organization. We slept on the floor of a Methodist church there in Miami. We would do service projects during the day and then in the afternoon we would go to a public pool to swim and then shower. (The church had NO showers). On Monday served lunch to about 250 homeless men and women at Missionaries of Charity. On Tuesday we led recreation for a group of kids through a poverty initiative group. On Wednesday we spent the day working on a Habitat for Humanity Home. That night we went to see Tampa Bay take on Miami in baseball. Thursday we went to Camillus house and served about 350 homeless men and women lunch, bagged popcorn and wrapped about 1000 sporks in napkins.
So, while I am off in Miami with a group of teenagers Sean is back here working like a dog. He had a ton of gigs and got very little sleep. When I came home Saturday night, the poor guy was exhausted.
The next day I get in my car and head north to MI to my sisters. Sean joins me on Wednesday night after a very exciting lightening filled flight. Flights had been delayed and cancelled because of a very large storm system. He flew from Nashville to Cincinnati and then into Grand Rapids. His flight from Cincinnati to Grand Rapids had to be re-routed to fly around the storm. Meanwhile my sister and I are sitting in the airport in Grand Rapids waiting for him to fly in. Eventually he made it in and we had a wonderful rest of the week. On Fri we spent the 4th of July at my brother-in-laws parents house on Hutchins Lake. Sean was brave enough to get on the wave runner with me again. I only almost knocked him off a couple of times. He was also brave enough to allow Matt to pull us around on the tube. That night we enjoyed a dinner of hotdogs, macaroni salad, chips, salsa and several types of desserts.
While we were in MI, I recieve an email from Nissan stating that they would place a lien on the title (reporting that it was paid for) so that I could change my last name. After we get home I take all of my paperwork along with a copy of our marriage certificate to T-dot and was finally able to get a TN tag. The next day I was able to get a TN drivers license and register to vote in our county.
The day after we returned home it was time for VBS. Sean and I taught the second grade. We had a wonderful group of kids. VBS on the whole was wonderful. The music was the best it had ever been. There were several kids that week made decisions for Christ which is the sign of a successful week of VBS!
We a week of downtime and being able to caught up with things here at the house. Then last week we spent the week doing Youth Super Summer. We had a wonderful week working with the youth. It was a time of great fellowship and worship. Watching the youth be totally free in their worship was an incredible experience and one that I was grateful to be able to witness. I also had the opportunity to hang out with some other adults in the church that I didnt know that well and develop some new friendships as well and strengthen some other friendships.
In the midst of all of this, Sean and I have been working to put more money into savings so we can fulfill our dream of adopting and expanding our family. Sean has also been called to be the Children's Worship Director at our church and he is spending time working on making that a wonderful ministry for the children of our church in hopes that the come to a saving relationship with Christ and the ones who have that relationship strengthen their walk.
On the adoption front there is really no new news to report. We are trying to decide between Mercy Ministries here in Nashville and Glandey Adoption Agency in Fort Worth, TX. We are so ready to move forward with this, but we are realilzing that this takes more time and preparation than we we thought. We want children like yesterday, but are trying to wait on the Lord to move us forward and lead us in the right direction. We ask the people continue to pray for us in this process.
We hope you have a wonderful start to fall. Sean is working hard and I start back to work tomorrow.
Sean and I started out planning on having a nice quiet summer at home, and just a couple days in we realized that would not be the case. My 2nd day of summer break started with my car failing inspection. So, that started a week and a half of my car being in and out of the shop. We dropped a large sum of money and my car passed inspection. Then, I think that the hardest part is over and that it will be a piece of cake to get my tags. Wrong again! I needed to have my title. Even though we paid off my car last summer Nissan never mailed the title. I call Nissan to a) get the title and b) have my maiden name changed to my married name b/c I never got it changed. Nissan tells me that they never released the title from the vault, but they will send it out and I should have it within 7-10 business days. They also tell me that they cant change my last name.
For our 3rd anniversary Sean and I spent a very relaxing day at Fall Creek Falls State Park. Sean and I ate a picnic lunch and then headed to the falls. We spent a great deal of the afternoon sitting in our chairs reading. The sun was out and for a little while we actually most of the place to ourselves. Later that afternoon we packed up our stuff and headed out of the park. Sean decided to treat me to a little bit of shopping at the Outlets of Lebenon and then onto dinner at Outback Steakhouse.
As I am dealing with all of the car stuff, I get an invite to be a substitute chaperone for a mission trip to Miami, FL. I was excited and nervous about the trip. So on bright and early on a Sunday morning I board a plane with the senior high students from West End United Methodist. We served for a week through the DOOR organization. We slept on the floor of a Methodist church there in Miami. We would do service projects during the day and then in the afternoon we would go to a public pool to swim and then shower. (The church had NO showers). On Monday served lunch to about 250 homeless men and women at Missionaries of Charity. On Tuesday we led recreation for a group of kids through a poverty initiative group. On Wednesday we spent the day working on a Habitat for Humanity Home. That night we went to see Tampa Bay take on Miami in baseball. Thursday we went to Camillus house and served about 350 homeless men and women lunch, bagged popcorn and wrapped about 1000 sporks in napkins.
So, while I am off in Miami with a group of teenagers Sean is back here working like a dog. He had a ton of gigs and got very little sleep. When I came home Saturday night, the poor guy was exhausted.
The next day I get in my car and head north to MI to my sisters. Sean joins me on Wednesday night after a very exciting lightening filled flight. Flights had been delayed and cancelled because of a very large storm system. He flew from Nashville to Cincinnati and then into Grand Rapids. His flight from Cincinnati to Grand Rapids had to be re-routed to fly around the storm. Meanwhile my sister and I are sitting in the airport in Grand Rapids waiting for him to fly in. Eventually he made it in and we had a wonderful rest of the week. On Fri we spent the 4th of July at my brother-in-laws parents house on Hutchins Lake. Sean was brave enough to get on the wave runner with me again. I only almost knocked him off a couple of times. He was also brave enough to allow Matt to pull us around on the tube. That night we enjoyed a dinner of hotdogs, macaroni salad, chips, salsa and several types of desserts.
While we were in MI, I recieve an email from Nissan stating that they would place a lien on the title (reporting that it was paid for) so that I could change my last name. After we get home I take all of my paperwork along with a copy of our marriage certificate to T-dot and was finally able to get a TN tag. The next day I was able to get a TN drivers license and register to vote in our county.
The day after we returned home it was time for VBS. Sean and I taught the second grade. We had a wonderful group of kids. VBS on the whole was wonderful. The music was the best it had ever been. There were several kids that week made decisions for Christ which is the sign of a successful week of VBS!
We a week of downtime and being able to caught up with things here at the house. Then last week we spent the week doing Youth Super Summer. We had a wonderful week working with the youth. It was a time of great fellowship and worship. Watching the youth be totally free in their worship was an incredible experience and one that I was grateful to be able to witness. I also had the opportunity to hang out with some other adults in the church that I didnt know that well and develop some new friendships as well and strengthen some other friendships.
In the midst of all of this, Sean and I have been working to put more money into savings so we can fulfill our dream of adopting and expanding our family. Sean has also been called to be the Children's Worship Director at our church and he is spending time working on making that a wonderful ministry for the children of our church in hopes that the come to a saving relationship with Christ and the ones who have that relationship strengthen their walk.
On the adoption front there is really no new news to report. We are trying to decide between Mercy Ministries here in Nashville and Glandey Adoption Agency in Fort Worth, TX. We are so ready to move forward with this, but we are realilzing that this takes more time and preparation than we we thought. We want children like yesterday, but are trying to wait on the Lord to move us forward and lead us in the right direction. We ask the people continue to pray for us in this process.
We hope you have a wonderful start to fall. Sean is working hard and I start back to work tomorrow.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Holding Pattern
Hey ya'll,
Just a quick udate for the month of May. There is nothing really to report. We are not sure if we are going to go through the agency we picked. They are very expensive and we arent sure we could come up with that kind of money any where in the near future. So, it is back to the drawing board. We are now looking at other agencies again and hopefully the Lord will work out something for us soon. Please continue to pray for us as we go on this journey. I can tell you that this is not at all where I thought we would be once Sean and I picked an agency. I was hoping to officially be parents in waiting at this point. Pray that we would not lose hope and that when all is said and done Sean and I will look back on this and say only the Lord could have worked things out and that HE recieves all of the glory!
As for our summer plans.
-I am headed to Chatanooga to the aquarium the first weekend in June with my mother.
-Sean and I are celebrating our 3rd anniversary on June 11th!!! (I LOVE him so much!!!!)
-Sean and I are meeting friends in Gatlinburg June 20-22nd.
-At some point we will head to my sister's in MI for a week or so.
Have a wonderful and blessed summer!!!!
Just a quick udate for the month of May. There is nothing really to report. We are not sure if we are going to go through the agency we picked. They are very expensive and we arent sure we could come up with that kind of money any where in the near future. So, it is back to the drawing board. We are now looking at other agencies again and hopefully the Lord will work out something for us soon. Please continue to pray for us as we go on this journey. I can tell you that this is not at all where I thought we would be once Sean and I picked an agency. I was hoping to officially be parents in waiting at this point. Pray that we would not lose hope and that when all is said and done Sean and I will look back on this and say only the Lord could have worked things out and that HE recieves all of the glory!
As for our summer plans.
-I am headed to Chatanooga to the aquarium the first weekend in June with my mother.
-Sean and I are celebrating our 3rd anniversary on June 11th!!! (I LOVE him so much!!!!)
-Sean and I are meeting friends in Gatlinburg June 20-22nd.
-At some point we will head to my sister's in MI for a week or so.
Have a wonderful and blessed summer!!!!
Monday, April 14, 2008
Adoption News!!!
Round One of the adoption paperwork is in the mail!!! It should be to our adoption consultant in about 3 days! I am hoping and praying that we will be able to move things forward a little faster now that it is in!
1)Please continue to pray for us as we walk through process.
2) Pray that we can "hurry up and wait"
3) Pray that the Lord will provide the finances
4) Pray for the birth mother and that we will be chosen by the right one
5) Pray for our little blessing. We don't know if he or she has even be conceived yet.
6) Pray that Sean and I would be the parents that we need to be.
As I sit here and type this I realize that I am filled with mixed emotions. I so excited to see what the Lord is going to do in the life of Sean and I and how He is going to expand our family. At the same time I have feelings of sadness and loss. Tomorrow (4/15) would have been my 3rd due date. Sean and I should be sitting on the couch waiting for the arrival of our 3rd blessing and here we are with no children and no longer pregnant. I don't want it to seem that I am not excited about adopting because I really and truly am, its just that its hard to acknowledge how we got here. We have 3 angels that we were never able to meet. I know that one day I will see all 3 of my beautiful children.
I also know that many people do not accept or acknowledge a miscarriage as a loss. We are probably the most overlooked group in the church. Watching the growing bellies of expectant mothers and the arrivals of the new babies is hard. A good friend of mine should have given birth last week and I should be this week. Yet, here we both are with empty arms (my friend does have an adorable little 2 yr old). At Mother's Day and Father's Day I am reminded that while people cant see our children it doesn't make Sean and I any less of a mother or father. We ARE parents.
So, as Sean and I take this journey that the Lord has us on, know that it is one filled with mixed emotion. I know that as time goes on and even when we bring home our little blessing, the 3 little ones we never met will never be far from our hearts. I cant wait to meet our little blessing the one we will be privileged to call son or daughter!
Thanks for reading our blog and joining us on this journey!
We love and appreciate all of you!
1)Please continue to pray for us as we walk through process.
2) Pray that we can "hurry up and wait"
3) Pray that the Lord will provide the finances
4) Pray for the birth mother and that we will be chosen by the right one
5) Pray for our little blessing. We don't know if he or she has even be conceived yet.
6) Pray that Sean and I would be the parents that we need to be.
As I sit here and type this I realize that I am filled with mixed emotions. I so excited to see what the Lord is going to do in the life of Sean and I and how He is going to expand our family. At the same time I have feelings of sadness and loss. Tomorrow (4/15) would have been my 3rd due date. Sean and I should be sitting on the couch waiting for the arrival of our 3rd blessing and here we are with no children and no longer pregnant. I don't want it to seem that I am not excited about adopting because I really and truly am, its just that its hard to acknowledge how we got here. We have 3 angels that we were never able to meet. I know that one day I will see all 3 of my beautiful children.
I also know that many people do not accept or acknowledge a miscarriage as a loss. We are probably the most overlooked group in the church. Watching the growing bellies of expectant mothers and the arrivals of the new babies is hard. A good friend of mine should have given birth last week and I should be this week. Yet, here we both are with empty arms (my friend does have an adorable little 2 yr old). At Mother's Day and Father's Day I am reminded that while people cant see our children it doesn't make Sean and I any less of a mother or father. We ARE parents.
So, as Sean and I take this journey that the Lord has us on, know that it is one filled with mixed emotion. I know that as time goes on and even when we bring home our little blessing, the 3 little ones we never met will never be far from our hearts. I cant wait to meet our little blessing the one we will be privileged to call son or daughter!
Thanks for reading our blog and joining us on this journey!
We love and appreciate all of you!
Monday, March 31, 2008
Praise God anyway...
Well March has been a month of ups and downs...
The first of the month, Sean and I got excited at the thought that we may be pregnant. I took 2 pregnancy tests and they both came back neg. This is not an unusual thing for me. With all 3 pregnancies to date, the tests didnt come back pos until later. During all of this a good friend had her 3rd miscarriage. The day after that reality set in that I was not pregnant.
The next week a couple from church gave birth to their first child Kaylee. This couple was told that they could not have a child naturally and the Lord blessed them inspite of the doctors!
The next week was spring break. My wonderful husband booked 2 nights in Gatlinburg for us. We were able to connect and talk. I came home for a couple of days and then headed to Dallas for a wedding of 2 two friends from the recreation ministry staff at First Dallas. I also was able to enjoy a 5 mile hike the day before the wedding with some friends from SWBTS.
I came back to work last Mon to a day in the office and staff activity. Tues 3/25, I recieve an email that a college classmate lost her battle to cancer. Thurs night Sean and I missed a call from Mike (a good friend of ours). Fri morning Mike got a hold of Sean and told him horrible news. Our friend JJ from Dallas was no longer with us. Sean and I got in the car and headed to Dallas about 2 hrs after that call.
On that same Fri another couple from church had their little girl. I am still waiting her name and all of her stats. But mom and baby are healthy!
Let me tell you a little bit about JJ. She is the oldest of 2 girls in a wonderful Christian family. She was married to Scott and has a beautiful little boy named Jonathon. She was a teacher and basketball coach at a private Christian school in the Dallas area. Her husband Scott is the Dean of Students at this same school. JJ touched may lives while here. She was active at the private school as well as at the church. She was never above helping anyone. Her family became our family away from home while we lived in TX. She loved life and the Lord and it showed in her words and her actions. JJ was 7mos pregnant and lost her little girl (Tonya Renee) Wed (3/26) and then a couple hrs later she was gone.
When Sean and I met with the family on Sat, their whole attitude was praise God anyway. They continued to say that God is good. The funeral was a celebration of JJ's life. The music was nothing I had ever heard at a funeral. We sang "Great is Thy Faithfulness" and "Victory in Jesus." The choir sang "Isnt He Good" and "Jersualem." The floor of the sanctuary at First Baptist Dallas was full and there were people in the balcony. The choir loft was full as well. The choir filled the loft and spilled over into the balcony. I was really touched when the choir was singing "Jersualem" and Scott and JJ's parents stood up and started praising God. I was moved to tears by this one action.
During the funeral Sean and I sat with a couple has 2 little children. Ella who has cerebral palsy and Will who is only a couple of months old. In the midst of everything they have been through with Ella, this couple has also chosen to say Praise God anyway.
I am amazed sometimes by the people around me who no matter what comes up choose to say Praise God anyway. My friend who miscarried has said this all through her blog. There are times that I know that is what I should be saying, but I cant always make myself say it. This weekend I have tried to keep that attitude. As a Christian I know that the Lord is in control and nothing catches Him off guard. He knew what this month would hold. He knew that there would be many ups and downs. He knew what all of us would be feeling and experiencing as we went through this month.
During the funeral on Sat, something our pastor says all the time kept playing over and over again in my head... Bro. Jerry says "There is nothing so certain as death and nothing so uncertain as the time." No one would have expected to bury a 32 yr old wife and mother, especially one who had been healthy just the day before. It made me think about the urgency that we should all live our lives. We should be sharing the Gospel with those around us. How many chances to share the Gospel do we miss on a weekly basis b/c we dont ask the Lord to show us? Do we tell our family and our friends that we love them like we should? Do we live a life that is pleasing to the Lord? Are there things in life that we say we will do one day and have yet to do any of them? What are we putting off? Are there people in our life that we need to make ammends with? We always assume there will be a tomorrow and there are no guarantees. As I am sitting here typing this I am not saying that I am doing all of these things, but these are things that I have been thinking about and praying about since that phone call Fri morning.
During the next couple of weeks take time to tell your family and friends how much you love and appreciate them. Let them know that you are praying for them. If there is someone in your life with whom things are not right, pick up the phone and call them.
I am not always sure who is reading my blog, but I do know that there are many good friends who read it. I hope all of you know that Sean and I love you very much and we are very appreciative of the love you have shown us through the years. Ya'll have been there to celebrate with us as well a cry with us. We are very blessed to have so many wonderful, godly friends!!! Thank you for being you and being willing to love us!!!! We pray for ya'll and hope that the Lord blesses all of you in a very special way!
Adoption note: We have almost all of round one of paperwork filled out. As soon as Sean completes our taxes we will get the last part of it filled out and into the mail. From there we will hopefully have a tentative homestudy date set!!!
Thanks again for your love and support. Remember that whatever comes up in your lives... Praise God anyway!!!!!
The first of the month, Sean and I got excited at the thought that we may be pregnant. I took 2 pregnancy tests and they both came back neg. This is not an unusual thing for me. With all 3 pregnancies to date, the tests didnt come back pos until later. During all of this a good friend had her 3rd miscarriage. The day after that reality set in that I was not pregnant.
The next week a couple from church gave birth to their first child Kaylee. This couple was told that they could not have a child naturally and the Lord blessed them inspite of the doctors!
The next week was spring break. My wonderful husband booked 2 nights in Gatlinburg for us. We were able to connect and talk. I came home for a couple of days and then headed to Dallas for a wedding of 2 two friends from the recreation ministry staff at First Dallas. I also was able to enjoy a 5 mile hike the day before the wedding with some friends from SWBTS.
I came back to work last Mon to a day in the office and staff activity. Tues 3/25, I recieve an email that a college classmate lost her battle to cancer. Thurs night Sean and I missed a call from Mike (a good friend of ours). Fri morning Mike got a hold of Sean and told him horrible news. Our friend JJ from Dallas was no longer with us. Sean and I got in the car and headed to Dallas about 2 hrs after that call.
On that same Fri another couple from church had their little girl. I am still waiting her name and all of her stats. But mom and baby are healthy!
Let me tell you a little bit about JJ. She is the oldest of 2 girls in a wonderful Christian family. She was married to Scott and has a beautiful little boy named Jonathon. She was a teacher and basketball coach at a private Christian school in the Dallas area. Her husband Scott is the Dean of Students at this same school. JJ touched may lives while here. She was active at the private school as well as at the church. She was never above helping anyone. Her family became our family away from home while we lived in TX. She loved life and the Lord and it showed in her words and her actions. JJ was 7mos pregnant and lost her little girl (Tonya Renee) Wed (3/26) and then a couple hrs later she was gone.
When Sean and I met with the family on Sat, their whole attitude was praise God anyway. They continued to say that God is good. The funeral was a celebration of JJ's life. The music was nothing I had ever heard at a funeral. We sang "Great is Thy Faithfulness" and "Victory in Jesus." The choir sang "Isnt He Good" and "Jersualem." The floor of the sanctuary at First Baptist Dallas was full and there were people in the balcony. The choir loft was full as well. The choir filled the loft and spilled over into the balcony. I was really touched when the choir was singing "Jersualem" and Scott and JJ's parents stood up and started praising God. I was moved to tears by this one action.
During the funeral Sean and I sat with a couple has 2 little children. Ella who has cerebral palsy and Will who is only a couple of months old. In the midst of everything they have been through with Ella, this couple has also chosen to say Praise God anyway.
I am amazed sometimes by the people around me who no matter what comes up choose to say Praise God anyway. My friend who miscarried has said this all through her blog. There are times that I know that is what I should be saying, but I cant always make myself say it. This weekend I have tried to keep that attitude. As a Christian I know that the Lord is in control and nothing catches Him off guard. He knew what this month would hold. He knew that there would be many ups and downs. He knew what all of us would be feeling and experiencing as we went through this month.
During the funeral on Sat, something our pastor says all the time kept playing over and over again in my head... Bro. Jerry says "There is nothing so certain as death and nothing so uncertain as the time." No one would have expected to bury a 32 yr old wife and mother, especially one who had been healthy just the day before. It made me think about the urgency that we should all live our lives. We should be sharing the Gospel with those around us. How many chances to share the Gospel do we miss on a weekly basis b/c we dont ask the Lord to show us? Do we tell our family and our friends that we love them like we should? Do we live a life that is pleasing to the Lord? Are there things in life that we say we will do one day and have yet to do any of them? What are we putting off? Are there people in our life that we need to make ammends with? We always assume there will be a tomorrow and there are no guarantees. As I am sitting here typing this I am not saying that I am doing all of these things, but these are things that I have been thinking about and praying about since that phone call Fri morning.
During the next couple of weeks take time to tell your family and friends how much you love and appreciate them. Let them know that you are praying for them. If there is someone in your life with whom things are not right, pick up the phone and call them.
I am not always sure who is reading my blog, but I do know that there are many good friends who read it. I hope all of you know that Sean and I love you very much and we are very appreciative of the love you have shown us through the years. Ya'll have been there to celebrate with us as well a cry with us. We are very blessed to have so many wonderful, godly friends!!! Thank you for being you and being willing to love us!!!! We pray for ya'll and hope that the Lord blesses all of you in a very special way!
Adoption note: We have almost all of round one of paperwork filled out. As soon as Sean completes our taxes we will get the last part of it filled out and into the mail. From there we will hopefully have a tentative homestudy date set!!!
Thanks again for your love and support. Remember that whatever comes up in your lives... Praise God anyway!!!!!
Friday, February 22, 2008
We picked an agency!!!
Well, I wish I had more to update. I know many of you have asked when I was going to post new news. We have chosen an agency. It is the Adoption Network Law Center. Here is what I know at this point. I talked to the agency this afternoon. We cant set the dates for the homestudy until we get in a round of paperwork. We dont have this paperwork yet. We should have it by the end of next week. They are going to send us a packet of paperwork as well as a video and some other information related to adoption. We will get everything filled out as quickly as we can so we can get the date for the homestudy set. The homestudy takes 2-3 mos. It is good for one year. If it is complete by the end of May, we will more than likely bring home our little blessing between Feb and March of 09 give or take.
I was told by our adoption consultant (AC) that they will place a healthy baby with us. They do an intensive screening on the potential birth mothers. For those of you who have done this before, this agency does about 300 placements a year. (Some of the other agencies we looked at only did anywhere from 27 to 130 placements a year). The AC says they get about 30-40 calls from potential birth mothers every day. There is also a very good chance that our new little blessing will not be born in the state of TN. We could be matched with a birthmother pretty much anywhere in the country. We were asked if we preferred a boy or a girl. Our response was as long as the baby is healthy we dont have a preference.
The most scary part is the cost. It is not what we thought it would be. When all is said and done we are looking at 30-40 thousand dollars. Yes, you read correctly 30-40 grand!!! So, for those of you who are prayer warriors, please pray that the Lord would drop this money in our laps, like manna from Heaven. Our God is a very big God and this is a drop in the bucket for him. I am struggling with how we are going to do this. We have no choice but to look to and trust the Lord to handle the financial side of things. Sean and I are making changes in our lifestyle. There are things that we love to do that we will have to sacrifice for the time being. We are cutting back almost quitting eating out. If you invite us to go out to eat, we may so no. Please know that we are not being stuck up, but we are trying to be good stewards of what we have and saving to bring home our little blessing. I get an adoption credit through work. We will also be applying for every grant that we can find. For those of you who have been down this road we would love to hear from you on how you financed your adoption(s). If at all possible we would like to avoid having to take out a loan. We realize that this is putting a great deal of faith in the Lord, but we know He is the ultimate provider.
There are some things that Sean and I are trying to take care of and work on now...
1) Trying to save as much as possible every month
2) Cutting back on eating out and shopping
3) Working on getting the scrapbook done (if any of you are blessed in this area I would love some help!)
4) Trying to get the house ready for a home visit. (Getting what would be the baby's room cleaned out, baby proofing our house. If any of you know where we can get a screen for the front of our fireplace for cheap, please let us know)
5) We are praying like we have never prayed before. We pray for the birthmother and our unborn baby. We pray that the Lord would provide the finances to cover all of the costs. We pray that we would be the parents that we need to be. We also pray that the Lord would allow us to see our little blessing grow up to accept Him as Savior.
I wish I knew what else we needed to do at this point, but like I said in the last post it is hurry up and wait. If there is anything that you would like to know that I havent answered in this post please feel free to ask. I love hearing the adoption stories that many of you are sharing. Please feel free to continue to share! I have had many people ask if they can give our blog address to other people and our answer is a resounding YES!!! We would like as many people to see our blog as possible. I have read comments from total strangers and I love it!!! I have also had many of you give my email to others and they have emailed me their adoption stories. Please keep them coming. Above all I ask you to please pray for Sean and I. This a huge lifechanging thing we are doing. We believe that the Lord has led us on this journey. We pray that we would continue to seek HIM in all that we do and that HE would lead the way!!!
I hope ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
I was told by our adoption consultant (AC) that they will place a healthy baby with us. They do an intensive screening on the potential birth mothers. For those of you who have done this before, this agency does about 300 placements a year. (Some of the other agencies we looked at only did anywhere from 27 to 130 placements a year). The AC says they get about 30-40 calls from potential birth mothers every day. There is also a very good chance that our new little blessing will not be born in the state of TN. We could be matched with a birthmother pretty much anywhere in the country. We were asked if we preferred a boy or a girl. Our response was as long as the baby is healthy we dont have a preference.
The most scary part is the cost. It is not what we thought it would be. When all is said and done we are looking at 30-40 thousand dollars. Yes, you read correctly 30-40 grand!!! So, for those of you who are prayer warriors, please pray that the Lord would drop this money in our laps, like manna from Heaven. Our God is a very big God and this is a drop in the bucket for him. I am struggling with how we are going to do this. We have no choice but to look to and trust the Lord to handle the financial side of things. Sean and I are making changes in our lifestyle. There are things that we love to do that we will have to sacrifice for the time being. We are cutting back almost quitting eating out. If you invite us to go out to eat, we may so no. Please know that we are not being stuck up, but we are trying to be good stewards of what we have and saving to bring home our little blessing. I get an adoption credit through work. We will also be applying for every grant that we can find. For those of you who have been down this road we would love to hear from you on how you financed your adoption(s). If at all possible we would like to avoid having to take out a loan. We realize that this is putting a great deal of faith in the Lord, but we know He is the ultimate provider.
There are some things that Sean and I are trying to take care of and work on now...
1) Trying to save as much as possible every month
2) Cutting back on eating out and shopping
3) Working on getting the scrapbook done (if any of you are blessed in this area I would love some help!)
4) Trying to get the house ready for a home visit. (Getting what would be the baby's room cleaned out, baby proofing our house. If any of you know where we can get a screen for the front of our fireplace for cheap, please let us know)
5) We are praying like we have never prayed before. We pray for the birthmother and our unborn baby. We pray that the Lord would provide the finances to cover all of the costs. We pray that we would be the parents that we need to be. We also pray that the Lord would allow us to see our little blessing grow up to accept Him as Savior.
I wish I knew what else we needed to do at this point, but like I said in the last post it is hurry up and wait. If there is anything that you would like to know that I havent answered in this post please feel free to ask. I love hearing the adoption stories that many of you are sharing. Please feel free to continue to share! I have had many people ask if they can give our blog address to other people and our answer is a resounding YES!!! We would like as many people to see our blog as possible. I have read comments from total strangers and I love it!!! I have also had many of you give my email to others and they have emailed me their adoption stories. Please keep them coming. Above all I ask you to please pray for Sean and I. This a huge lifechanging thing we are doing. We believe that the Lord has led us on this journey. We pray that we would continue to seek HIM in all that we do and that HE would lead the way!!!
I hope ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Hurry up and wait!
First I want to say congratulations to Joe and Andrea on the birth of their son William Cutler born Jan 29th at 7:51pm. He was 21 inches and weighed 7lbs and 10 oz. He was also welcomed by big sister Ella. I pray blessings on your new family!
OK, here I am 3 weeks after Sean and I officially decided to start our whole process. We still dont have the money we need and we still dont officially have an agency picked out. We are seriously considering going through Adoption Law Network Center. Everything we have read and heard about them is great! We are getting paperwork together and even have a folder to put it all in!
Mom and I went to Hobby Lobby last weekend and bought our scrapbook, the paper and some other things that I think I may need. I did call my sister, the scrap-booking queen, to ask questions. I have been going through pictures and trying to decide what to put in the book. (It was fun taking a trip down memory lane). Sean and I have many facets that make up our lives. We want the book to show all of the facets, making sure our personalities shine through. So far, we have some pages picked out. There will be a performing arts page for both of us. There will be a friend page for both of us as well as one that shows us with mutual friends. Sean will have a work page. I cant b/c of what I do. I will also put in pictures of our engagement, wedding, honeymoon and anniversaries. These are the pages we know we want for sure, but beyond that we dont know.
In choir we have been singing 2 songs that really have spoken to my heart. I was embarressed 2 weeks ago in choir b/c I started crying. It was like I could hear God asking me, "Do you really believe what you are singing?" I had to be honest and answer no. The song is "My life is in your hands." The phrase "With Jesus I can make it, with Him I know I can stand, no matter what may come my way, my life is in your hands" really got to me. There is so much more to this song than just that line, but it was the one the stuck out to me. Do I really believe that with Jesus I can stand and walk through this whole process? Do I really believe that I my life is in His hands? Do I believe that He will work all of this out for Sean and I? The second song is "My God is a Mountain Mover." Do I believe that my God can move mountains? (I feel like I am asking Him to move Mt. Everest for us). Do I believe that He would for Sean and I?
In my heart of hearts I know that God can do whatever HE wants! I know that He will give us the child we need and expand our family as HE sees fit. The problem comes in that in my heart I know these things to be true, but my head doesnt always think that way. I am a very black and white person, with very few shades of gray. My head looks at where things stand with this whole process and doesnt see how this will all work. I have trouble making my heart knowledge head knowledge, by moving it up 8 inches. (If any of you know my salvation experience, you know that I had to make head knowledge heart knowledge). As a believer we sometimes have to move information up instead of down.
So, here we are at the end of Jan and I am feeling very impatient. I am so frustrated that things have not worked themselves out NOW! I want to be a mother like yesterday. I want to make Sean a father! I want to give our parents grandchildren. I want my sister to finally have a niece and/or nephew from me. I want to be able to tell Hannah and Logan (my neice and nephew) that they have a new cousin(s). I want to be able to talk with friends about raising children and really understand where they are coming from. I know in a way this sounds very selfish and very much I,I,I... but I am inpatient. I WANT a child (actually several) to love and raise.
So, we are raising our money. We are cutting back on eating out. I am cutting back and pretty much cutting out on shopping. Sean is cutting back on Starbucks. Sean is trying to take extra gigs. We have our references picked out. I am getting the letter that I need from work. We are taking baby steps. Yes, they are steps in the right direction. I am at the point, where I am ready to RUN, not take baby steps, not even walk at a brisk pace, but RUN full speed ahead so that we can hold our little blessing.
Sean and I are praying for the birthmother. We dont even know if she is pregnant yet. If she is, she may just be finding out. I read on an adoption board (one lady talking to another one) that our baby may not be ready for us yet, or we may not be ready for our baby just yet. I pray that when all is said and done, that we have our child, the one the Lord intended for us to love and raise!
I guess I throw all of this out there to ask that you continue to pray for Sean and I. Please pray for the birthmother and our baby. Pray that the Lord will open the doors that need to be open. Pray that in all of this Sean and I are able to keep our focus on HIM. Pray that when everything falls into place, that we will give the Lord all of the glory and remember He chose to give us that blessing.
I hope ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
OK, here I am 3 weeks after Sean and I officially decided to start our whole process. We still dont have the money we need and we still dont officially have an agency picked out. We are seriously considering going through Adoption Law Network Center. Everything we have read and heard about them is great! We are getting paperwork together and even have a folder to put it all in!
Mom and I went to Hobby Lobby last weekend and bought our scrapbook, the paper and some other things that I think I may need. I did call my sister, the scrap-booking queen, to ask questions. I have been going through pictures and trying to decide what to put in the book. (It was fun taking a trip down memory lane). Sean and I have many facets that make up our lives. We want the book to show all of the facets, making sure our personalities shine through. So far, we have some pages picked out. There will be a performing arts page for both of us. There will be a friend page for both of us as well as one that shows us with mutual friends. Sean will have a work page. I cant b/c of what I do. I will also put in pictures of our engagement, wedding, honeymoon and anniversaries. These are the pages we know we want for sure, but beyond that we dont know.
In choir we have been singing 2 songs that really have spoken to my heart. I was embarressed 2 weeks ago in choir b/c I started crying. It was like I could hear God asking me, "Do you really believe what you are singing?" I had to be honest and answer no. The song is "My life is in your hands." The phrase "With Jesus I can make it, with Him I know I can stand, no matter what may come my way, my life is in your hands" really got to me. There is so much more to this song than just that line, but it was the one the stuck out to me. Do I really believe that with Jesus I can stand and walk through this whole process? Do I really believe that I my life is in His hands? Do I believe that He will work all of this out for Sean and I? The second song is "My God is a Mountain Mover." Do I believe that my God can move mountains? (I feel like I am asking Him to move Mt. Everest for us). Do I believe that He would for Sean and I?
In my heart of hearts I know that God can do whatever HE wants! I know that He will give us the child we need and expand our family as HE sees fit. The problem comes in that in my heart I know these things to be true, but my head doesnt always think that way. I am a very black and white person, with very few shades of gray. My head looks at where things stand with this whole process and doesnt see how this will all work. I have trouble making my heart knowledge head knowledge, by moving it up 8 inches. (If any of you know my salvation experience, you know that I had to make head knowledge heart knowledge). As a believer we sometimes have to move information up instead of down.
So, here we are at the end of Jan and I am feeling very impatient. I am so frustrated that things have not worked themselves out NOW! I want to be a mother like yesterday. I want to make Sean a father! I want to give our parents grandchildren. I want my sister to finally have a niece and/or nephew from me. I want to be able to tell Hannah and Logan (my neice and nephew) that they have a new cousin(s). I want to be able to talk with friends about raising children and really understand where they are coming from. I know in a way this sounds very selfish and very much I,I,I... but I am inpatient. I WANT a child (actually several) to love and raise.
So, we are raising our money. We are cutting back on eating out. I am cutting back and pretty much cutting out on shopping. Sean is cutting back on Starbucks. Sean is trying to take extra gigs. We have our references picked out. I am getting the letter that I need from work. We are taking baby steps. Yes, they are steps in the right direction. I am at the point, where I am ready to RUN, not take baby steps, not even walk at a brisk pace, but RUN full speed ahead so that we can hold our little blessing.
Sean and I are praying for the birthmother. We dont even know if she is pregnant yet. If she is, she may just be finding out. I read on an adoption board (one lady talking to another one) that our baby may not be ready for us yet, or we may not be ready for our baby just yet. I pray that when all is said and done, that we have our child, the one the Lord intended for us to love and raise!
I guess I throw all of this out there to ask that you continue to pray for Sean and I. Please pray for the birthmother and our baby. Pray that the Lord will open the doors that need to be open. Pray that in all of this Sean and I are able to keep our focus on HIM. Pray that when everything falls into place, that we will give the Lord all of the glory and remember He chose to give us that blessing.
I hope ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
My two cents about Two Rivers
(This is the long version of a letter that I wrote to the Tennessean after viewing an article this past Sunday. The actual letter that I sent the Tennessean was under 300 words. So this letter is about twice the length of what I sent to the Newspaper. Still, I wanted those not connected with the church to hear the truth, and not just what the newspaper is reporting. If you have an opinion or want me to email you the abbreviated letter, please email me at Sean@BalloonsMagicandMore.com)
I love it how people jump to conclusions and don't do any firm research on a news story, much like what is being reported on Two Rivers in the Tennessean on
- The church is audited by an external accounting firm every year to make sure that the church is operating within proper guidelines. To my knowledge, the church has always received a clean bill of health.
- When all of the commotion about Two Rivers and finances first came up, the church had another audit done to make sure it’s accounting and spending practices were considered legitimate. Once again, Two Rivers got a clean bill of health.
- Two Rivers budget is in line with most other large churches in
- Two Rivers is probably not the only mega church in the
- We don’t know what the dinner was all about. Just because we don’t know the details of this event, doesn’t mean that any staff member of Two Rivers has done something wrong.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Me and Scrapbooking?
Sean and I are still trying to put money into savings so we can get our homestudy done. We are praying that the Lord will bless Sean with some extra gigs, so this can happen sooner rather than later! We are still in the process of trying to get some of the paperwork together. I have been talking to some ladies on an adoption board and "listening" to their stories. I have also been asking questions about what we need to do to be ready for the homestudy. As far as I can we are on track with all of that.
One of the things I have been told that I need to do it put together a scrapbook for our birthmother. We have no idea who she is at this point. I have been told that we need to put in pictures of us showing our hobbies, favorite activities, vacations, places we have lived, the wedding, the honeymoon, our dog and other things that will show our personality and our lifestyle. If ya'll know me, you know that I am not the scrapbooking type. That being said I am starting to get pictures together. My mother is in town this weekend and we are going to go look at the scrapbooking store in Opry Mills. This may sound weird, but please pray that I can put together a scrapbook that shows who we really are and that it will look good.
As soon as there is more to update, I will post. I hope that ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
One of the things I have been told that I need to do it put together a scrapbook for our birthmother. We have no idea who she is at this point. I have been told that we need to put in pictures of us showing our hobbies, favorite activities, vacations, places we have lived, the wedding, the honeymoon, our dog and other things that will show our personality and our lifestyle. If ya'll know me, you know that I am not the scrapbooking type. That being said I am starting to get pictures together. My mother is in town this weekend and we are going to go look at the scrapbooking store in Opry Mills. This may sound weird, but please pray that I can put together a scrapbook that shows who we really are and that it will look good.
As soon as there is more to update, I will post. I hope that ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Faith Required
Well here we are trying to figure out this whole adoption thing. We have a place that can do our homestudy, and we are trying to get the paperwork together. That being said we are praying that the Lord would work out the finances. There are so many grants we can apply for once our homestudy is done, but not before then. To get the homestudy done, we kind of need the money for it.
As I look at what all we need to be able to adopt and possibly buy a house it honestly freaks me out. In my heart of hearts, I know that what we need is only a drop in the bucket of God's bank. I believe that we are doing what the Lord has called us to do. I still struggle with beleiving that the Lord is going to work all of this out and that we will have a house and beautiful little blessing. I know that all I have to do is have the faith of a mustard seed. Somedays I am not sure that I have even that. I am sure there are times that the Lord looks down and shakes His head at me.
For those of you who read our blog and believe in the power of prayer, we are asking for prayer! Please pray that the Lord would help Sean and I to get the money we need and that we would be good stewards of what we already have. I hope to be able to update soon with a homestudy date! I think we may have also picked out the agency that we are going to go through, but we will announce that at a later date!
I hope ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
As I look at what all we need to be able to adopt and possibly buy a house it honestly freaks me out. In my heart of hearts, I know that what we need is only a drop in the bucket of God's bank. I believe that we are doing what the Lord has called us to do. I still struggle with beleiving that the Lord is going to work all of this out and that we will have a house and beautiful little blessing. I know that all I have to do is have the faith of a mustard seed. Somedays I am not sure that I have even that. I am sure there are times that the Lord looks down and shakes His head at me.
For those of you who read our blog and believe in the power of prayer, we are asking for prayer! Please pray that the Lord would help Sean and I to get the money we need and that we would be good stewards of what we already have. I hope to be able to update soon with a homestudy date! I think we may have also picked out the agency that we are going to go through, but we will announce that at a later date!
I hope ya'll have a wonderful and blessed weekend!
Friday, January 11, 2008
And the journey begins...
Sean and I have started the process of trying to get a homestudy done. We have talked to several people and been online. I have to call a lady on Mon (1/14). The company she works for does homestudies all over the state of TN. We would like to have the date of our homestudy set by the end of this month if at all possible. Please pray that the Lord would show us who should do our homestudy.
There is something I meant to share in my last post. Adoption is the perfect picture of what Christ has done for us. We are not "born" into God's family. It is only through Christ that we have the blessing of being God"s children. When we adopt, we have like other parents the privilage of sharing the love of Christ with them. When the adopted children accept Christ they truly become a member of our family. I know that the day we bring them home, they are apart of our family, but them coming to know Christ makes them a part of our family for eternity. I hope this is coming across like I want it to.
Thank you for your prayers and keep checking back. As things happen and decisions are made, we will keep you posted!
I hope you all have a blessed weekend!
There is something I meant to share in my last post. Adoption is the perfect picture of what Christ has done for us. We are not "born" into God's family. It is only through Christ that we have the blessing of being God"s children. When we adopt, we have like other parents the privilage of sharing the love of Christ with them. When the adopted children accept Christ they truly become a member of our family. I know that the day we bring them home, they are apart of our family, but them coming to know Christ makes them a part of our family for eternity. I hope this is coming across like I want it to.
Thank you for your prayers and keep checking back. As things happen and decisions are made, we will keep you posted!
I hope you all have a blessed weekend!
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
A mother's heart...
I am going to share my heart with all of you reading this blog. This is not going to be a happy, feel good post, but a transparent look at my heart. I am not looking for sympathy, but asking for prayers and support for Sean and I. I would like to share with you the journey that Sean and I have been on. Many of you know where we have been and many of you dont. I am at a point where I can write and share. I hope that some of this is not considered an overshare, but that you see the spirit in which it was intended. We love each and everyone of you who read our blog. We value the friendships in which we have with all of you. If by some chance you have stumbled onto our blog, welcome and I hope that the Lord uses it to bless you in someway...
When Sean and I got married in June of 05, I had no idea that just shy of our 3rd anniversary we would be sitting where we are. I had no idea that getting pregnant and staying pregnant would be as hard as it has been. My dream was to get pregnant on our honeymoon. Instead, we got pregnant that Novemeber. In December, I found out I was pregnant and surprised Sean and work on a Monday. That Wednesday (12/17) night I miscarried our first angel. Late March, early April of 06 we got pregnant again. The last week in April I started spotting and was put on bedrest. We hoped and prayed that bedrest would work. I miscarried our 2nd angel on May 5th. At that point we took a break and waited to try again until after I had graduated from seminary and we moved back to TN. In July of 07 we got pregnant again. I held my breath and prayed that the Lord would allow this baby to hold on. On Aug 15, I miscarried our 3rd angel.
During much of this I have felt like a failure as a woman and a wife. After all a woman's body was created to carry and give birth to a baby. I became very angry with the Lord, and very jealous of the growing bellies around me. I admit that even now I struggle with this. In our church there are several ladies who are due in April. It frustrates me that I am not going to be in that group. I honestly rejoice in their healthy pregnancies and pray that they all have wonderful births and that their families are blessed by the blessing on the way. There have been times when I feel like there is no hope of ever relizing my dream of having a house full of children.
Sean has been a great source of strength and encouragement through all of this. He has dealt with the losses in his own way. It has been hard for him in the fact that he cant fix this for me. I married a man who likes to fix things. If he thought I wanted the moon, he would do what he could to get it for me. He has prayed for us every night and tells me constantly not to give up hope.
In September, I went to my Dr and she said that everything looks like it should. She then ordered a series of blood tests. I probably had about 20 tubes of blood drawn in 2 trips to the lab. One of the things my Dr was looking for was to see if I had a blood clotting disorder. The labs didnt really show much of anything. It was determined that I have a folic acid deficiency. My Dr then sent me to the maternal fetal specialist. (A maternal fetal specialist deals in high risk pregnancies).
I was a little confused as to why I was being sent to this new Dr even though I wasnt pregnant. When I got there I understood. This Dr also deals with women who are sitting where I am. She looked at all of the labs and gave us a mixture of good and bad news. First she said that I am 1 gene carrier for 2 types of blood clotting disorders. She said that if I were a 2 gene carrier for either type that this would be a cause for the early miscarriages. She then said the good news is that I can get pregnant. The bad news comes in that when we get pregnant the baby does not attach to the uterine wall like it should, thus resulting in the early miscarriages. She said that we may have several more miscarriages before I ever carry a baby to full term. She said that if we were not pregnant by Jan then we needed to call my Dr and get a referral to the TN Fertility Clinic.
After the 2nd miscarriage, Sean started talking about adoption. I was not at all ready to think about that let alone talk about it. In May of 07, I started looking at agencies, but I still was not really ready to accept that for us. Shortly after our appointment with the maternal fetal specialist, I was ready to start thinking about, really praying about and talking about us adopting. We decided that we would wait until Jan to see where we were with pregnancy. Before any of you get excited we are not pregnant. We are going to call to get the referral, but we are also going to start the adoption process.
For me this excites me and scares me all at the same time. There are so many agencies. We have the option of domestic and international adoption. We also have the option of pursuing an open or closed adoption. Each agency has its own set of rules and fees. We also have to have a homestudy done and we dont know where we need to turn for that. We are gathering all of the information that we can. We are praying that the Lord will show us which agency we need to go through. We are also praying that the Lord will provide the funds we need to go through with this process. We pray that the Lord will match us with the right birthmother and/or baby. There are so many unknowns at this point.
If you have been through this process or are adopted we would love to hear your story. If you have suggestions about agencies or other things we should know or think about please post. If you know of a pregnant lady who is not married and is considering adoption please think about us. If you know people who are going through this process, please send them to this blog. I found an online board and one of the ladies on there, was able to adopt through a friend. That friend called her and said that there was a lady in labor who wanted to give up here chuld for adoption. She and her husband drove 2 hrs and then brought home their child 2 days later. This gives me hope. I know that the Lord can use what avenue He chooses to bring us this child or children. As we get information and get things going we will be posting updates.
Thank you for reading this post. I am feeling more and more encouraged about starting this process. I hope and pray that by the time Christmas comes that we are either holding a baby in our arms or that we at least know that our little blessing is on the way. Thank you again for your friendship and your prayers. I pray that the Lord blesses you in this new year!!!
When Sean and I got married in June of 05, I had no idea that just shy of our 3rd anniversary we would be sitting where we are. I had no idea that getting pregnant and staying pregnant would be as hard as it has been. My dream was to get pregnant on our honeymoon. Instead, we got pregnant that Novemeber. In December, I found out I was pregnant and surprised Sean and work on a Monday. That Wednesday (12/17) night I miscarried our first angel. Late March, early April of 06 we got pregnant again. The last week in April I started spotting and was put on bedrest. We hoped and prayed that bedrest would work. I miscarried our 2nd angel on May 5th. At that point we took a break and waited to try again until after I had graduated from seminary and we moved back to TN. In July of 07 we got pregnant again. I held my breath and prayed that the Lord would allow this baby to hold on. On Aug 15, I miscarried our 3rd angel.
During much of this I have felt like a failure as a woman and a wife. After all a woman's body was created to carry and give birth to a baby. I became very angry with the Lord, and very jealous of the growing bellies around me. I admit that even now I struggle with this. In our church there are several ladies who are due in April. It frustrates me that I am not going to be in that group. I honestly rejoice in their healthy pregnancies and pray that they all have wonderful births and that their families are blessed by the blessing on the way. There have been times when I feel like there is no hope of ever relizing my dream of having a house full of children.
Sean has been a great source of strength and encouragement through all of this. He has dealt with the losses in his own way. It has been hard for him in the fact that he cant fix this for me. I married a man who likes to fix things. If he thought I wanted the moon, he would do what he could to get it for me. He has prayed for us every night and tells me constantly not to give up hope.
In September, I went to my Dr and she said that everything looks like it should. She then ordered a series of blood tests. I probably had about 20 tubes of blood drawn in 2 trips to the lab. One of the things my Dr was looking for was to see if I had a blood clotting disorder. The labs didnt really show much of anything. It was determined that I have a folic acid deficiency. My Dr then sent me to the maternal fetal specialist. (A maternal fetal specialist deals in high risk pregnancies).
I was a little confused as to why I was being sent to this new Dr even though I wasnt pregnant. When I got there I understood. This Dr also deals with women who are sitting where I am. She looked at all of the labs and gave us a mixture of good and bad news. First she said that I am 1 gene carrier for 2 types of blood clotting disorders. She said that if I were a 2 gene carrier for either type that this would be a cause for the early miscarriages. She then said the good news is that I can get pregnant. The bad news comes in that when we get pregnant the baby does not attach to the uterine wall like it should, thus resulting in the early miscarriages. She said that we may have several more miscarriages before I ever carry a baby to full term. She said that if we were not pregnant by Jan then we needed to call my Dr and get a referral to the TN Fertility Clinic.
After the 2nd miscarriage, Sean started talking about adoption. I was not at all ready to think about that let alone talk about it. In May of 07, I started looking at agencies, but I still was not really ready to accept that for us. Shortly after our appointment with the maternal fetal specialist, I was ready to start thinking about, really praying about and talking about us adopting. We decided that we would wait until Jan to see where we were with pregnancy. Before any of you get excited we are not pregnant. We are going to call to get the referral, but we are also going to start the adoption process.
For me this excites me and scares me all at the same time. There are so many agencies. We have the option of domestic and international adoption. We also have the option of pursuing an open or closed adoption. Each agency has its own set of rules and fees. We also have to have a homestudy done and we dont know where we need to turn for that. We are gathering all of the information that we can. We are praying that the Lord will show us which agency we need to go through. We are also praying that the Lord will provide the funds we need to go through with this process. We pray that the Lord will match us with the right birthmother and/or baby. There are so many unknowns at this point.
If you have been through this process or are adopted we would love to hear your story. If you have suggestions about agencies or other things we should know or think about please post. If you know of a pregnant lady who is not married and is considering adoption please think about us. If you know people who are going through this process, please send them to this blog. I found an online board and one of the ladies on there, was able to adopt through a friend. That friend called her and said that there was a lady in labor who wanted to give up here chuld for adoption. She and her husband drove 2 hrs and then brought home their child 2 days later. This gives me hope. I know that the Lord can use what avenue He chooses to bring us this child or children. As we get information and get things going we will be posting updates.
Thank you for reading this post. I am feeling more and more encouraged about starting this process. I hope and pray that by the time Christmas comes that we are either holding a baby in our arms or that we at least know that our little blessing is on the way. Thank you again for your friendship and your prayers. I pray that the Lord blesses you in this new year!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
